Zaphod Weinberger

Jesus Lizard singer David Yow never dug Bad Brains, or baseball, but may be starring in a movie about one.

Fuck, my arm. That has to be what every pitcher thinks, or says to their mom or wife, after a start.

Will using four mediocre starting pitchers instead of five make the Rockies any good?

We realize this whole thing is all still a bit confusing, so we’re here to answer all of your idiotic questions about what exactly went down.

Stop cutting your hair all stupid, NBA players.

Is the former NBA superstar and leading man of "Kazaam" really that bad at being himself?

You wonder if there’s something intrinsic these geezers have that others don’t.

The Spurs don’t deserve their rough reputation among idiot half-awake check-in basketball fans. They're the NBA’s model franchise.

Huff some glue and skate to Meryful Fate in Florida this weekend.

The Knicks aren’t getting any more good players, and the guys they have aren’t good enough. Maybe you should read a book or something instead of watching Knicks games next year?

Like the Knicks’ season, it seemed doomed from the start.

Even though the historically dismal Clippers are getting better, their nixing of Clipper Darrell insures that their fans will be booing the franchise for a long time.