The Grammys Have Asked Artists To Cover Up Their Genitals

According to a leaked "wardrobe advisory" from US network CBS, they have imposed a butt crack, boobs and genitals ban on artists due to perform at the Grammy Awards this weekend. A line-up which includes the likes of Rihanna, Taylor Swift, Kelly Clarkson and Alicia Keys (ugh, 'cos that Kelly Clarkson is always aching to get her rat out, right?)

Rather than sending out a BCC all email with the subject line "put some clothes on whores", they went down, like, a Victorian indecency laws route:

"Please avoid exposing bare fleshy under curves of the buttocks and buttock crack. Bare sides or under curvature of the breasts is also problematic. Please avoid sheer see-through clothing that could possibly expose female breast nipples. Please be sure the genital region is adequately covered so that there is no visible 'puffy' bare skin exposure."

"Fleshy under curves", yeah? And LMAO at "puffy". Remember when Winehouse had to cover up her tit-toos for the Grammys?

IKR? On one hand, I'm sure CBS are stuck in a quandary of getting as many people to tune in without offending the permanently offended "THINK OF THE CHILDREN" crew, but also having to rein in a bunch of sociopathic popstars. On the other hand, we're all fucked to hell anyway and probz nothing kids see on the snooze-fest that is the Grammys, is going to stop the Hieronymus Bosch painting style future that's probably in store for us, where we'll all be crotch-pumping and putting stuff up each other and watching 2 Girls 1 Cup loudly on our phones in public anyway.

Anyway, more importantly, was while I was copy-and-pasting Deadline's report I happened to scroll down to the plethora of lulz in the comment section:

Pretty sure the outline of Rihanna's labia alone is behind "the Muslims" hateorama.

"Purveyors of filth" is actually an excellent name for a rap crew. Who wants in?

OK, that one was a troll_face.jpeg but, ummm…

CAPS LOCK PUNCH!

When will heterosexuals catch a break?

Amen to that.

So, are CBS right to enforce a "wardrobe advisory" or should we let our popstars roam free to expose their lycra-clad genitals as much as they want?